Film Reviews, News, And Editorials From A Conservatarian Perspective
Not since The Bye Bye Man has a January release been so bad that it was almost good…almost. I tell you what, Keanu Reeves should not do anymore films that don’t have the name John Wick attached to them because his recent non-wick projects have not been very good. Replicas is no different because this might be the dumbest film of 2019 for a laundry list of reasons.
Critics have a hard enough time these days maintaining credibility in the face of being called shills for certain studios or even being criticized for being the wrong race and gender to review a movie in the first place. Fair or unfair, it is a bad look for the industry to turn into attack dogs that serve push the agenda of ideologues and I’m saying this as an openly biased critic. Is The Upside a great film? No, but it is a very good one but if you are waiting for mainstream critics to tell you that, you may be dealing with people who decided to sink the movie before it ever had a chance.
January is a known dumping ground for bad movies and with Escape Room being the only major release this week, it’s pretty obvious that Hollywood isn’t even going to try this year. But is the movie based on the popular group puzzle game really that bad?
On the day of the U.S. presidential election in 2024, Ahab (HA) and his team of elite mercenaries embark on a secret CIA mission to abduct North Korea’s Armed Forces Minister in an underground bunker below the Korean Demilitarized Zone (DMZ). However, they get caught in the crossfire which causes tensions to escalate to the brink of World War III.
Last month, I reviewed the South Korean Comedy Intimate Strangers and when I saw the trailer for Kill Mobile, I literally thought it was the exact same movie…and I was right. The 2016 Italian film Perfect Strangers is currently spouting remakes all across the globe. So since I’ve already watched the South Korean version, let’s see how the Chinese version holds up.
Detective Sherlock Holmes and Dr. John Watson join forces to investigate a mysterious murder at Buckingham Palace. It seems like an open-and-shut case as all signs point to Professor James Moriarty, the criminal mastermind and longtime nemesis of the crime-solving duo. When new twists and clues begin to emerge, the world’s greatest sleuth and his trusted assistant must now use their legendary wits and ingenious methods to catch the killer before the queen becomes the next victim.
Connecticut, home to rich elite Democrats who value lawns and driveways so they don’t live in New York City. Apparently, it is also the home to sociopathic teenagers who have to buy their friends and mull over killing people in order to bring any sense of joy to their miserable existence…so yeah they nailed Connecticut.
Well…It is the weekend before Christmas which is notoriously the busiest weekend of the year for movie theaters. So if the line you are in is too long for films like Aquaman, Bumblebee, and Mary Poppins Returns, you can always watch the latest Jennifer Lopez movie Second Act…I’m sure that the line will be pretty short.
Set in what I assume is the late 1980s, The War On Cybertron reaches its boiling point as Optimus Prime and the Autobots are forced from their homes and must retreat to Earth due to their civil war against the Decepticons. The first Autobot to arrive on the planet is B-127 also known as Bumblebee. Bee is forced into hiding until a young girl named Charlie (Hailee Steinfeld) finds him in a junkyard. Together they must protect Bee from not only the Military led by a vengeful John Cena but the Decepticon soldiers who seek the termination of the remaining Autobots.
Earlier this year, Clint Eastwood wrote and directed a film starring three young heroes who stopped a terrorist attack in France called The 15:17 to Paris. Unfortunately, this gamble did not pay off as the movie with amateur actors bombed critically and didn’t reach the heights that Eastwood set for the film. Ten months later, Eastwood has a chance at redemption with a film called The Mule and Eastwood does not flub his second chance.
